Credit Card Breaking Up Is Hard To Do

 

How many credit cards do you own?

Target offers a 5% discount.  Jordan's furniture is 90 days same as cash.  Old Navy passes out $10 coupons for every $100 you spend.  Special discounts at Macy's, free shipping with Amazon, Kohls Cash, airline miles with MasterCard, discount car washes at Mobile.  We once bought a car on a credit card to get the Discover Card cash back bonus.

Beau-Hunkly and I have skirted the well known dangers of credit cards for years and cashed on in all sorts of deals. 

Keep in mind, we have never had an issue.  We do not carry a balance and have never paid a late fee.  Our FICO score is through the roof.  We just feel so wanted.  And accepted.  Not denied.

Did you know that credit cards were not invented until the 1950s?  Baby Boomers are the first generation to use plastic, yet the credit card industry is one of the most profitable of the 20th century.

As part of our new family budget, we decided to get rid of all credit cards.  Every.  Single. One.  

I spent an entire week of lunch hours calling creditors to close our accounts.  It was pretty sad for all of us.  I took the breakup harder than I thought. 

"We've been together for 23 years." I whispered to MasterCard.  "You were my first."

"Thank you, generous friend," I told Kohls.  "Even when I lost my coupon, you gave me another chance."

"You have to believe me when I tell you I am not switching to Walmart," I pleaded with Target. "I am not cheating on you."

"Maybe I do need some space," I agreed with Home Depot.  "I am glad you still want to be friends."

Old Navy and I reminisced about the fun times we had last Christmas.

Macys offered to take me back, no questions asked, if I changed my mind.

Mobile sent me two free car washes, like a sad farewell gift.

MasterCard vowed to keep my airline miles active, like old love letters wrapped in ribbon.

Thank you, credit card friends and lovers.  Thank you.

It's been a few months now.  I miss them.  I still remember the colorful rainbow in my overstuffed wallet, the cashier's smile when I loyally handed over my department store card, the milestone of finally reaching gold card status.  


The excitement of getting a bill in the mail?